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Chat Room and Website Support / Re: Chat Room (Flashchat not working)
« Last post by Lon on January 25, 2017, 09:16:01 PM »Flashchat is back online
Recent Posts
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General Discussion / Re: Sick of Recovery – how do I get the bounce back in my step?
« Last post by Eggbeater on January 24, 2017, 02:15:49 PM »I can relate to going through slumps in recovery and not really wanting to be here sometimes. But the truth is that I don’t do very well on my own. I need these assholes that I’ve been judging. When I pull away and I isolate I don’t listen to anyone’s head but my own and that is dangerous for me. I’ve proven it several times and being a good addict I have taken it to the edge and almost lost my clean time. Sometimes my disease tells me I different and no one understands me even in NA and then I isolate. Sometimes I just flat out hate people and I don’t like the way they do things in NA. But the truth is I have to save my ass and none of my feelings matter if I am dead. And if I sit in my misery long enough I start to wish I was dead and I act like I am using without any dope in my system. I have been through this cycle a lot and the way I pull out of it is to seek out a newcomer who needs some support. Sounds funny but this has yanked me out of myself for long enough to get my priorities straight and appreciate what I have and get my gratitude back. Helping somebody else has saved my ass more times than I can count even when I feel like I have nothing to offer. Good luck to youl
Hugs!
Lillie
Hugs!
Lillie
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General Discussion / Sick of Recovery – how do I get the bounce back in my step?
« Last post by jstew318 on January 24, 2017, 12:18:44 PM »Here’s the skinny…
I’m 37 years old, active in addiction for 23 years. Numerous attempts at getting clean, but never working a program throughout the years. I’ve always been a successful, likable person. Not much family to speak of, but had a great network of friends back home. Never really alone, always had something to do, someone to hangout with or go places with. Came to a new state 14 months ago to try rehab again for the 7th time. Decided to stay and work a program here. Ended up going through 30 days then onto 60 days of sober living. Got a sponsor, working steps, meetings almost everyday. I even started a meeting here in town that has been flourishing. I landed a supreme, cozy job at a software company, had a decent amount of people in recovery to hang out with. Began studying Buddhism more, mediation and yoga, principals and such. So here I am, almost 18 months clean and totally miserable. To date, I’ve not talked to my sponsor in about 2 months, he’s not reached out to me either. Stopped on the first part of step 3, meeting attendance has dropped to once a week, the meeting I started. No longer want to be the GSR or do h&I, speak or anything. I fell utterly alone. Seems that the recovery community tends to only stay connected with you if you’re regularly attending meetings. I’ve kept 2 close friends in the program since I’ve been lacking with my attendance. One person has reached out to ask how I’ve been over the past few months. I’m having a difficult time placing principals before personalities. I’m sad because my friendships that I made here in the rooms aren’t strong enough to hold fast unless I’m active in the meeting scene. I was once a pretty popular folk in the rooms here in town. Began really hanging out, but now I stay pretty much alone. It sucks that I have to put all the effort into these friendships and I don’t get the same effort in return. I’m starting to judge people, taking a mad inventory of them, accusing them in my mind for using NA as a crutch to not be responsible for their behaviors. Feeling like I have to do this by myself or maybe not at all and just go back out to fill the emptiness again. I had such a loving community, regardless if using was involved. those people back home were genuine friends. No strings attached. One addict helping another, feeling at home in meetings, all of it is the total opposite of what I’m experiencing now. I want to call out the liars in the meetings that embellish/lie about their drug use, then turn around and share something or post something on social media that is totally ludicrous, because I know they are lying. I’m angry all the time, I’m empty, I no longer want anything to do with this but deep down I know how dangerous that could be. not sure if I should go back home, get my old job back, I don’t know. Reality is real to me now. I’m one day not going to be here and that scares me. I’m in a new state and I feel alone in recovery. I feel I can’t be honest with my current sponsor, that I can’t share my deepest secrets with him. I’m not comfortable and our relationship has taken a hit after another situation he and I went through, but that is a different, non-relevant story. Suggestions welcomed. Thanks!
I’m 37 years old, active in addiction for 23 years. Numerous attempts at getting clean, but never working a program throughout the years. I’ve always been a successful, likable person. Not much family to speak of, but had a great network of friends back home. Never really alone, always had something to do, someone to hangout with or go places with. Came to a new state 14 months ago to try rehab again for the 7th time. Decided to stay and work a program here. Ended up going through 30 days then onto 60 days of sober living. Got a sponsor, working steps, meetings almost everyday. I even started a meeting here in town that has been flourishing. I landed a supreme, cozy job at a software company, had a decent amount of people in recovery to hang out with. Began studying Buddhism more, mediation and yoga, principals and such. So here I am, almost 18 months clean and totally miserable. To date, I’ve not talked to my sponsor in about 2 months, he’s not reached out to me either. Stopped on the first part of step 3, meeting attendance has dropped to once a week, the meeting I started. No longer want to be the GSR or do h&I, speak or anything. I fell utterly alone. Seems that the recovery community tends to only stay connected with you if you’re regularly attending meetings. I’ve kept 2 close friends in the program since I’ve been lacking with my attendance. One person has reached out to ask how I’ve been over the past few months. I’m having a difficult time placing principals before personalities. I’m sad because my friendships that I made here in the rooms aren’t strong enough to hold fast unless I’m active in the meeting scene. I was once a pretty popular folk in the rooms here in town. Began really hanging out, but now I stay pretty much alone. It sucks that I have to put all the effort into these friendships and I don’t get the same effort in return. I’m starting to judge people, taking a mad inventory of them, accusing them in my mind for using NA as a crutch to not be responsible for their behaviors. Feeling like I have to do this by myself or maybe not at all and just go back out to fill the emptiness again. I had such a loving community, regardless if using was involved. those people back home were genuine friends. No strings attached. One addict helping another, feeling at home in meetings, all of it is the total opposite of what I’m experiencing now. I want to call out the liars in the meetings that embellish/lie about their drug use, then turn around and share something or post something on social media that is totally ludicrous, because I know they are lying. I’m angry all the time, I’m empty, I no longer want anything to do with this but deep down I know how dangerous that could be. not sure if I should go back home, get my old job back, I don’t know. Reality is real to me now. I’m one day not going to be here and that scares me. I’m in a new state and I feel alone in recovery. I feel I can’t be honest with my current sponsor, that I can’t share my deepest secrets with him. I’m not comfortable and our relationship has taken a hit after another situation he and I went through, but that is a different, non-relevant story. Suggestions welcomed. Thanks!
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Chat Room and Website Support / Re: Chat Room
« Last post by Lon on January 17, 2017, 10:12:23 PM » Jan 17. 2017 – Adobe blocked ports in it’s latest update killing off Flash IRC clients across the internet so changes have to be made – please use the Mibbit chat
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Chat Room and Website Support / Chat Room (Flashchat not working)
« Last post by KristenM on January 16, 2017, 11:09:09 PM »Hey the chat room won’t load for me and I have updated my Shockwave.
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In or Just Out of Treatment, Rehab, or Prison? / Reaching Out
« Last post by Kat on January 05, 2017, 01:59:12 AM »From na.org regarding the newsletter Reaching Out:
To view all archived newsletters click on the following link:
http://www.na.org/?ID=reaching-out-index
Quote
Welcome to Reaching Out! Whether you are an NA member, a professional who works with recovering addicts, an incarcerated member or a member who provides Hospital and Institution service, this NA World Services newsletter may be a resource for you. Reaching Out in its design helps incarcerated addicts connect to the NA program of recovery, enhances H&I efforts and offers experience from members who successfully transitioned from the ‘inside’ to be productive members of society. The section “From the Inside” is filled with letters and artwork from incarcerated addicts who share their experience, strength and hope as they find and maintain recovery from addiction through NA. “From the Outside” section features stories from members who are living drug free in the community and have previously been incarcerated. Often, there is artwork from members on the ‘outside’. Additionally, this section offers experience from H&I members who value and are deeply committed to carrying the NA message of recovery to addicts who are unable to attend regular NA community meetings. These letters are inspirational for many as they offer hope for a new way to live and they provide evidence of the efficacy of the NA program for any reader.
To view all archived newsletters click on the following link:
http://www.na.org/?ID=reaching-out-index
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Na.org News, Projects and Surveys 2016-17 / Interested in participating in a workgroup or helping with a project this cycle?
« Last post by Kat on January 03, 2017, 08:16:18 PM »From na.org:
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Interested in participating in a workgroup or helping with a project in some way this cycle? We will be coordinating several virtual focus and workgroups and possibly some face-to-face workgroups this cycle. If you are interested in the Future of the WSC; Service Tools for Groups, Areas, and Events; Delegate Sharing; WSC Seating; or any of our other projects or periodicals, please let us know at [email protected]. If you have not completed a World Pool form, please complete one (www.na.org/HRP).
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Na.org News, Projects and Surveys 2016-17 / Interested in PR? H&I? Inmate Step Writing? Check it out!
« Last post by Kat on January 03, 2017, 08:03:06 PM »From na.org:
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Interested in PR? H&I? Inmate Step Writing? Please write [email protected] or [email protected] to sign up for these member-driven web meetings; these are held every three to four months.
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Na.org News, Projects and Surveys 2016-17 / Interested in attending an na.org web meeting about service in rural locations?
« Last post by Kat on January 03, 2017, 08:01:13 PM »From the "News" page at na.org…
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Doing service in a rural location? Na.org recently started web meetings for those serving in rural locations. Please write to [email protected] if you would like to be notified of the next web meeting.
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Na.org News, Projects and Surveys 2016-17 / Doing Service in Rural Locations? Check it out!
« Last post by Kat on January 03, 2017, 07:59:29 PM »From the "News" page at na.org…
Quote
Doing service in a rural location? Na.org recently started web meetings for those serving in rural locations. Please write to [email protected] if you would like to be notified of the next web meeting.